So last weekend my wife and I bought a Christmas tree…

As we fought our way through the line of giant Christmas trees and wild and crazy Holiday shoppers, my wife and I finally found “the prefect Christmas tree”.

WhackedOut Christmas Lights?

We bought the tree and a stand, and then nearly flew back home at blistering 35 miles per hour so the tree wouldn’t blow off the roof of my car.  

Frantic Holiday shoppers not wanting to miss a minute of the weekend after Thanksgiving shopping frenzy blew their horns begging me to pull over so they can pass me.

When we finally arrived home, we unpacked the Christmas lights for the tree (15 boxes of lights) and my wife immediately noticed the warning label, which alerted us to the fact that the Christmas tree lights contain lead.  Being the health-councious women my beautiful wife is, she asked if I wouldn’t mind doing the lights by myself.

I figured if the years of eating lead paint chips and 3 gallons of paste in kindergarden hasn’t hurt me yet, I must be immune to lead or something…

I looked up at the 10′ tree, then back down at the lights, and said… suuuure.

It took me over 3 hours to get all of the lights on the tree.  

Then something terrible happened two times.

And I hate to admit, but my wife even shed some tears last night…

As I write this, I’m looking out my window and I see that Christmas tree I worked so hard decorating, the tree that made me drive to Home Depot, Garden Ridge, and Lowes three different times, and to add to the mix, even some blood was shed.  (I carried in the tree myself with only few minor injuries.)

So what is our Christmas tree doing OUTSIDE of my house?

… And what in the hell does any of this have to do with Marketing for that matter?

The answers to the above questions will be posted within the next day or two… or… well… as soon as I can find a way to get this damn tree out of my backyard, I’ll fill you in on the rest of this horrible, horrible story.